bumps and scratches

I wrote this a bit back but I figured I'd record it here... ta da!


Can we start over? Is that even a possibility? Or am I forever to be numbed by your existence and person? But see, it's not an independently constant numb. No, the wound is fresh and once left to sit it starts to burn more and more until I heal it. And then the scarring begins. I treat the wound delicately and I treat it well. But it still hurts. It still stings. Sometimes I bump into something and a different level of pain surges for a moment, leaving me momentarily impaired. But it does fade away-slowly. And the scab does finally form. And, yes, the wound hurts much less but you still nkow it's there. And now you have to be even more careful because the new scab is tender and, if careless, you could bump into something and rip off that tender scab. The wound is expose once more and all the work from before is lost.

I bumped into you. And the scab only lifeted on one very small corner, leaving most of the wound protected. But I started focusing on that corner a little too much. And I started picking it. And I keep picking at it. And now I'm worried I've lifted too much of the scab's edge to leave it lightly covering the wound. It might be better just to rip it off. But then... the wound stands reopened.